Break Free From These 7 Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
For many autistic individuals, life can feel like a constant battle against a world that just doesn’t seem to understand.
Sensory overload, social anxiety, and rigid thinking patterns make even simple tasks exhausting. Individuals on the autism spectrum often turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms just to get through the day.
Luckily, it is possible to overcome unhealthy coping mechanisms and using better, healthy coping strategies for mental health instead.
7 Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms and How To Overcome Them
- Escapism
One of the top unhealthy coping mechanisms among autistics is escapism. This means withdrawing from the real world into fantasy, gaming, or compulsions. On the surface, escapism seems harmless, but taken to extremes it can be dangerous.For example, someone may immerse themselves in video games to avoid social interactions or obsessively research special interests for hours to numb emotions and shut out real life. The problem is that while escapism provides temporary relief, it prevents developing healthy coping skills. It also leads to isolation and neglecting responsibilities.
So what are some healthier ways to get that immersive experience? First, set time limits around gaming and online activities. Use a timer to stick to a reasonable amount per day. Second, find social hobbies that provide immersion through collaboration and creativity rather than isolation.
Join a roleplaying group, a massively multiplayer online role playing guild (known as MMORPG), or fandom circles to get into fantasy worlds with others. Finally, channel special interests into educational activities. Take an online course, join a real-life club, or plan sightseeing trips related to your fascinations. These are all healthy coping strategies for mental health.
- Over-Reliance on Routine
Many autistic people, especially those with high support needs, rely heavily on structure and routine. But too much reliance on sameness day in and day out becomes an unhealthy coping mechanism.Sticking to rigid schedules creates a sense of control and predictability. However, change is inevitable. When disruptions happen, it can be severely distressing. Meltdowns, shutdowns, and outbursts often result from an unexpected break in routine.
While some structure is stabilizing, having no flexibility at all leads to anxiety and distress when plans inevitably go awry. It helps to actively incorporate flexibility into schedules. Try penciling in spontaneous time or having back-up options when main events get cancelled. Work on self-regulation skills to handle transitions and adapt to changes. And don’t forget compassion—remember that meltdowns are often involuntary reactions to feeling overwhelmed.
Reduce shame around them by communicating needs to others. Routine provides comfort but learning to bend rather than break allows for a fuller life.
- Controlled Eating Habits
Disordered eating habits are another common but unhealthy coping mechanism. Some autistic people overeat to deal with unpleasant emotions and sensations.The excess sugar and calories may dampen sensitivities. Others under-eat due to taste sensitivities, texture issues, or because controlling food intake gives a sense of order. But neither extreme is sustainable or healthy long-term.
Developing a more balanced diet and relationship with food is important. Start by identifying any nutritional deficiencies or needs. Work with a doctor to treat symptoms or conditions exacerbated by dietary habits. Slowly expand food horizons by trying one new safe food a week. Take smaller steps to adjusting portion sizes or meal frequency.
Honor cravings sometimes, but learn to differentiate emotional and physical hunger. And most importantly, make self-compassion and self-care priorities, not calorie restriction. Food is nourishment, not control.
Many autistics (children as well as adults) can be very picky eaters. Food colors, textures, smells, and sights can either attract or repel them. As part of the dietary journey, as much as possible, work on branching out more on food choices. Small steps are large gains.
- Masking and Camouflaging
Many autistic individuals unconsciously take on personas or mimic others in social situations to fit in. This masking and camouflaging is often described as exhausting and unsustainable, and is an unhealthy coping mechanism.Long-term, suppressing authenticity causes burnout, anxiety, depression, and damaged self-esteem. But learning social skills doesn’t have to mean masking.
Start socializing in environments where you can comfortably be yourself, like special interest meet-ups or online autistic groups. Build skills at your own pace without expectations to be “normal.” Look for social skills classes that focus on developing confidence, learning conversational cues, reading body language, and building empathy.
Therapeutic roleplaying allows practicing new skills in a safe environment and helps with healthy coping strategies for mental health. While masking impedes self-discovery and growth, learning brings confidence and authentic connection.
The autism journey has ups and downs but with the right strategies, it is possible to cope with challenges in a healthy way, prevent burnout, and thrive. Focus on understanding your needs, communicating openly, and being compassionate with yourself and others. Don’t be afraid to ask for help from mental health professionals, family and friends. No one should feel like they have to tackle life alone. Healthy coping strategies for mental health can make all the difference.
- Picking and Pulling Is One of Coping Strategies for Anxiety
Some autistic people engage in self-stimulatory or self-injurious behaviors like skin-picking, hair-pulling, nail-biting, hand-flapping, or head-banging. These behaviors provide sensory input and may help relieve anxiety and tension in the moment. But they are unhealthy coping mechanisms and can cause physical harm and social issues.Replace picking/pulling behaviors with safer stimming activities. Keep clay, fidget toys, gum, or other sensory tools on hand. Get a fidget ring to play with hands when the urge strikes. Ask your doctor about body socks or compression wear to provide soothing pressure. For flapping and bouncing behaviors, designate a safe stimming space filled with pillows, trampolines or crash pads. Finding safe movements and materials can satisfy sensory needs.
If you can’t replace the behavior entirely, set goals to reduce frequency and severity. Bandage picked areas to prevent infection and allow healing. Use gloves or band-aids to cover and protect hands and fingers prone to picking. Track behaviors and use motivation charts to gradually improve. And consider therapy to address any trauma or anxiety driving these habits. With time, healthier stimming habits will emerge.
- Handling Criticism
Many autistic individuals struggle with receiving criticism and negative feedback, no matter how constructive or well-intentioned. It may trigger painful memories of being misunderstood or bullied. Difficulty reading tone and intentions makes criticism feel like a personal attack. Some cope by lashing out at the critic or withdrawing from the relationship.Start by remembering the person likely means well. Seek clarification of their tone and actual criticisms. Ask guiding questions like “Could you rephrase that?” or “What did you mean by…” to better understand. Consider the feedback when emotions have calmed down. Determine if it holds any truth to improve upon. Remember every person has room for growth – criticism is an opportunity, not a condemnation.
If you are the parent or loved one of someone with autism, remember how you communicate can have a direct impact on the autistic’s reaction. While never easy, choosing the right time and place to have discussions and phrasing the information carefully can go a long way in how it is perceived, and accepted. Staying calm is one of the best strategies for autism adults and their loved ones.
Anger is certainly an unhealthy coping mechanism, and prefacing conversations by saying you have difficulty receiving feedback can help the process. Ask others to be mindful of tone and phrasing. Offer tips like focusing criticism on actions rather than personality. Developing awareness of sensitivities while also pushing personal boundaries leads to growth.
- Perfectionism
The autistic mind is geared towards noticing and analyzing details. While this lends itself to excelling in areas of special interest, it can also result in perfectionist tendencies. Perfectionism reflects a desire to control outcomes and avoid mistakes. But making mistakes is how humans learn.Combat perfectionism and/or obsession by focusing less on results and more on effort and improvement. Celebrate small wins rather than obsessing over setbacks. Develop growth mindset habits like writing down three things done well after finishing a task. Replace self-criticizing thoughts with compassion and curiosity. Perfection isn’t possible or sustainable and the drive to achieve it is an unhealthy coping mechanism, because disappointment is inevitable. Self-acceptance and flexibility lead to greater resilience and joy.
Don’t Hesitate to Get Help in Learning to Cope
Healthy coping strategies for mental health are essential for living your best life possible. Autistic or not, we all have our own traumas and pain and we all need to learn how to handle it properly. Therapy can really help with this but make sure you get a good therapist, just like every other profession there are bad therapists that will just cause more problems so it’s very important that you find a good one that can actually help you.
After that you can begin your healing journey and become a better person and the person you were meant to be. This is something everyone must do, so take pride you are taking your first steps.
Whenever I’m feeling stressed or overwhelmed, I take a deep breath and focus on the present as one of my coping strategies for anxiety. This helps calm me and puts things into perspective. I also try to meditate and the way you do that is to sit in a quiet room and sit still and be with own thoughts. I believe that a lot of people’s problems in life can be solved if they just do this for 10 minutes or so every once in a while. I recommend you do this too; it will help, it’s good for the mind and the soul.
Living Your Best Life
Eliminating or reducing unhealthy coping mechanisms and replacing them with healthier alternatives takes time, self-reflection, and a lot of trial and error. But the journey is worth it. Living authentically, embracing life’s ups and downs, and nurturing mental health leads to a fulfilling life.
With the right support and strategies, autistic individuals can better manage challenges, understand themselves deeply, and play to their unique strengths. The road may be bumpy at times, but utilizing coping strategies for autism adults ultimately leads to a beautiful destination.
Other Common Autistic Behaviors
There are many behaviors associated with having autism. Keep in mind that everyone presents differently, which is why it is caused a spectrum disorder. However, there are common autism behaviors. Learn more about them.
- Autism and Eye Rolling: Why It’s Odd, But Perfectly Okay
- Eye Contact Avoidance: 8 Best Ways to See Eye to Eye
- 10 Proven Techniques for Managing Autism and Sensory Issues
- Understanding Neurodiversity: Uprising of the Neurodivergent
- Autism and ADHD: Making Sense of the Overlap
- Autism Masking & Code Switching: How to Redefine Acceptance
- Autistic Stimming Behaviors: Why We Do and How It’s Important
- OCD and Autism: Could You Have One Condition or Both?
- Autism in Sports: Hyper-Focus Can Be A Commanding Competitive Advantage